The Utterly Fabulous GOLDEN FLEA Awards, 1611

The GOLDEN FLEA Prizes for Excellence in Psyllophilous Poetry, awarded to the best poems (in Yr Hble & Obdt Editor’s infallible Estimation), originally publish’d in The FLEA from June, 1610 to May, 1611; the afore-said awards consisting of valuable ætheric Trophies, so utterly Metaphysical that they do not euen exist in Body Natural, but only in the Realm of the Ideal. This Year they are awarded to—

Mistress Anna Evans, for ‘The Persistence of Desire’:
http://www.the-flea.com/Issue12/PersistenceofDesire.html

Mr. Amit Majmudar, for ‘The Yo-yo’:
http://www.the-flea.com/Issue12/TheYo-yo.html

Mistress Ann Drysdale, for ‘When Mister Nifty Plays the Bones’:
http://www.the-flea.com/Issue14/WhenMisterNiftyPlaystheBo.html

&,

Mr. Stephen Edgar, for ‘The Representation of Reality in Western Art’:
http://www.the-flea.com/Issue15/TheRepresentationofRealit.html

These awards to be deliuer’d vnto the honour’d Recipients by a host of Angels in a Glory!

For further Intelligence of these Transcendendental Phenomena, please consult the following Æ-Page; viz., http://www.the-flea.com/Issue16/Editorial.html

Down at The Mermaid with The Flea

An evening down the Pub, and aftermath -- with John Whitworth, Ann Drysdale, Les Murray, Geoff Page, Peter Wyton, Anna Evans, Rick Mullin, Stephen Edgar, Ben Jonson, Timothy Murphy, Marly Youmans, Duncan Gillies MacLaurin, Susan Taylor, John Donne, Salli Shepherd &c. &c. Hangover remedies from John Whitworth & Alan Gould. Followed by uplifting ejaculations from George Herbert.

http://www.the-flea.com/Issue16/index.html

Hugh Fox Reading ‘Since’ from Broadsheet 12

Hugh Fox reads his poem ‘Since’, published in The Flea’s Broadsheete 12.

THE FLEA’s Birth-daye Bumper Broadsheet Pub-Crawle

In the Merry Month of May, 2011, THE FLEA will attain his Second Birthday; maugré the vicissitudes of Dame Fortuna, and the desuetudes occasion’d by the Agenbyte of Fleawitte; THE FLEA having so thrived & swyv’d & prosper’d, & swolne moreover, that the once-wee Bug-ger, inflated to this preposterous Girth of Poetick Rotundity, his belly stuff’d with verses Physickal & Metaphysickall, is more aptly address’d as Sir Cumference, than as Sir FLEA!

This Fal-staffe of Fleas, this Ralph Roister Doister of Suttle Inter-netted Verse, this Jiggynge Hobbie-Horse-Pegasus of Poetry, accordingly proposes to celebrate his Happy Anniversarie by heading to

THE MERMAID TAVERN,

or, 

Down the Pub!

THE FLEA therefore invites the Canting Crewe, the Poets, Satyrists, Wittes, Gallants, Fine Ladies, Dells & Doxies, & sundrie divers Revellers, to join it in a Poetic Pub-Crawl to THE MERMAID TAVERN, for a BUMPER BIRTHDAY BROAD-SHEETE, or, it may be, BROAD-SIDE. Thus you may supply Yr Arrogant & Vnruly Editor with select verses compos’d to fit the occasion, on such topicks as:

Ale, Beer, Quaffing, Rollicking, Toasting, Ducke-drunkenness, Lager-Loutes, lustfull Meeting of shining Eyes across a crowded Bar, Wine, Absinthe, Pub-crawling, Pub-brawling, Arrest by the Watch for Drunk & Disorderly, Absinthe, the Heady Intoxication of Love, a Round or two for a Pound or two, Chundering, Beer-goggles, Lost Week-endes, Remorseful Hang-overs;or whatever invention the Poetic Imagination can devize to suit this Bacchanalian & Celebratory theme; and moreover in any mood, from boisterous to maudlin, as may seem apt to the inspiration of the Poet.

Keyboard-Quille THREE of your poetick Effusions in a Fayre Hand, and inclose them in the Submission Forme on the THE FLEA’s Submitte Page, or within an æ-mail address’d to Yr Editor (whose Address may be found vpon that same Submitte page), and be certayne to inscribe THE MERMAID TAVERN as the subject line, or near the toppe of your submission. NB. It is suggested that verses hotly compos’d in a divine afflatus of inspir’d intoxication, be afterwards reviz’d in a more sober & critickal disposition & frame of Minde.

When Yr Editor deems that sufficient lively Bacchanalian Verses have accrued, he will at that point close the Submissions. These Pub-Crawle Birthday Submissions will be in sur-plus & addition to the current General Submissions (which close on the 22nd of January). Authors who have submitted work for the general issues of THE FLEA may nevertheless submit also for this special themed May Birthday Broadsheet.

        Souls of poets dead and gone,
        What Elysium have ye known,
        Happy field or mossy cavern,
        Choicer than the Mermaid Tavern?

Sundrie Adviz’ments Concerning SUBMISSIONS &c.

THE FLEA’s first few Broadsheets for 2011 are filling up rapidly. Poets who have submitted work already should rest assur’d that Yr Editor is working diligently through the very large number of submissions in the order of receipt, and that their place in the queue for consideration is secure.

But Authors who submit henceforth from this present Day, until the close of the general Reading Period, viz. the 22nd day of January, should be appriz’d that Yr Hble Editor probably will not be able to put their work (should he chuse it for THE FLEA) into a Broadsheet before about June, or, it may be, even later. So IF Authors still desire to submit work nevertheless, they should factor into their stratagems that it may be a delay of some several Monthes before Publication. One Broadsheet of THE FLEA will, Deo volente, be publish’d each month during 2011, until August; beyond which Yr Editor hath not deviz’d.

AND MOREOVER there will be a special themed Bumper issue for THE FLEA's Secound Birthday Party in May; the Theme to be announc’d anon. Authors & Readers may summon to mind the extravagant Psychedelic Bug Rave of May, 2010, on the Occasion of THE FLEA's First Birthday. Yr Hmble & Obdt is still recovering from that Event. Not necessarily stoned, but... beautiful... http://www.the-flea.com/Issue8/index.html

The Submissions Portcullis is Open’d!

The portcullis of THE FLEA Broad-sheetes is now rais’d, and Yr Horrible & Obedient Editor is entertaining poetic Submissions during the next monthe or there-aboutes; therefore, Authors wishing to submit poetic Effusions of a somewhat metaphysical complection for Editorial consideration may consult the Principles of Submission, situated at this address on the Ætheric Inter-nette; viz. http://www.the-flea.com/Submit.html

A Timely Announcement

The submissions Portal of THE FLEA will swing creakily open on 22nd December 2010, that being one Yeare and a Day since it laste faste clos’d. THE FLEA expecteth to remain open to poetickal Submissions for at least one month past that daye of December 22nd; thereafter, when Yr Hmble Editor may opine that sufficient worthy Poems have accumulated to keep this Metaphysicalzine a-hopping and a-popping for the next few terms, the Portal will again slam dustily shut. Poems accepted during this reading period will not necessarily be publish’d in the very first Broadsheet of 2011, but will appear in various issues over the first six Monthes of that year.

THE FLEA calls for no enforc’d Theme in workes submitted to it. It prefers to dine on formal verse, but does not revile well-crafted vers libre, in the style favour’d in the Virginia colonies & among some Continental versifyers. The tiny Insecte’s own Proboscine Instincte for what pleaseth it well, must remaine, as from its very inception, its principal Criterion in chusing meete Verses to exhibit within these Broadsheets; but Poetry which toucheth happily on matter or style congenial to our late glorious Elizabethan Age, or to our modern Jacobean reigne, will invite the keene attention of Yr Hmble Bug-Ey’d Editor; as moreover, for the general, will verses that do not resile from complex Allusion, unexpected Imagery, or darkness of poetick Style. THE FLEA ever strives to chuse poetry which shines with exuberant Witte, daring Conceites, & fine intellectual Play, & which is express’d with exquisite imagistic & emotional Modulation. But no doctrinaire Orthodoxy may be discern’d in THE FLEA’s selection regime; merely the sharpe glimmer of the sotte-weede sodden Editor’s capricious Whim and consider’d Judgment.

THE FLEA has been justly endors’d and celebrated by Poets, Criticks & Wittes, from our far-flung colony of New York, even unto Shepton Mallet, and beyond! It boasts an extensive & gentle Readership, having published numerous widely-fam’d Authors, epical, lyrical, mediatative & metaphysickal; shining Luminaries of the vary’d Poetickal-Celestial Spheres.

Therefore, Ye Poets, Bards, Vates, Native-Wittes, University-Wyttes, Gentlemen, Lords & Ladies, Clerkes, Scriveners, Roaring-Boyes, Roaringe-Girls, Tom o'Bedlams, Abraham Men, Upright Men, Dells, Doxies, Cony-Catchers, Bawdie-Baskets, & all the vary’d ranks & degrees of the Canting Crewe — take up your Quills! Invoke the Muse, and cunnyngely compose, with an Eye ever fix’d to thys bright Portal of Poetickal Opportunity!

Yrs &c,

Paul Stevens B.A. (Hons), Dip.Ed, Fellowe of the Royal Society of Alchymists & Astrologers